Humor Quote by John Irving — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“You've got to get obsessed and stay obsessed.”

“Don't forget this, too: Rumors aren't interested in the unsensational story; rumors don't care what's true.”

“It doesn't really matter who said it - it's so obviously true. Bevore you can write anything, you have to notice something.”

“You can't learn everything you need to know legally.”

“O God — please give him back! I shall keep asking You.”

“JUST BECAUSE A BUNCH OF ATHEISTS ARE BETTER WRITERS THAN THE GUYS WHO WROTE THE BIBLE DOESN'T NECESSARILY MAKE THEM RIGHT!" [Owen Meany] said crossly. "LOOK AT THOSE WEIRDO TV MIRACLE-WORKERS--THEY'RE TRYING TO GET PEOPLE TO BELIEVE IN MAGIC! BUT THE REAL MIRACLES AREN'T ANYTHING YOU CAN SEE--THEY'RE THINGS YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE WITHOUT SEEING. IF SOME PREACHER'S AN ASSHOLE, THAT'S NOT PROOF THAT GOD DOESN'T EXIST!”

“I’m fine, Mom. Thanks for asking.”

“God, I love a man who reads”

“You're not right in the head, and nor am I, and this is why....this is why I like you.”

“Writers don't make any money at all. We make about a dollar. It is terrible. But then again we don't work either. We sit around in our underwear until noon then go downstairs and make coffee, fry some eggs, read the paper, read part of a book, smell the book, wonder if perhaps we ourselves should work on our book, smell the book again, throw the book across the room because we are quite jealous that any other person wrote a book, feel terribly guilty about throwing the schmuck's book across the room because we secretly wonder if God in heaven noticed our evil jealousy, or worse, our laziness. We then lie across the couch facedown and mumble to God to forgive us because we are secretly afraid He is going to dry up all our words because we envied another man's stupid words. And for this, as I said, we are paid a dollar. We are worth so much more.”

“There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.”