“The whole point of diaries is that other people find them and read wha...” — Helen Fielding Quote

The whole point of diaries is that other people find them and read what you've put. I did once take to writing my inner thoughts on the computer at the end of other things I was writing and ended up faxing four pages of hideous stuff to my accountant so I don't do that now.

Comedy tends to come out of things which are quite painful and serious.

Can officially confirm that the way to a man's heart these days is not through beauty, food, sex, or alluringness of character, but merely the ability to seem not very interested in him.

If we can't have comedy books written about aspects of womanhood without going into a panic attack about it, then we haven't got very far at being equal.

I used to work at a hotel. I was the order-taker for room service. My mom worked at the hotel as an accountant.

Yeah, I went to business school and I actually worked as an accountant for about eight months. It's not what I wanted, but it was definitely a move to appease the parents.

A lot of the younger Indian generation are either IT geniuses or doctors - the number of doctors I've seen in L.A. who are Indian is just crazy. So it is a very common thing. Or an accountant! That again is a very, very big thing.

I'm a footballer and not a lawyer or an accountant and my job is to take care of business out on the pitch.