“I don't think anyone leaves Las Vegas rejuvenated, their skin shining,...” — Iliza Shlesinger Quote

“I don't think anyone leaves Las Vegas rejuvenated, their skin shining, their bank accounts glowing. No one leaves Vegas, like, 'I didn't make one mistake. That felt great. Back to work.'”

“I was a huge 'Blind Date' fan, though, when I was younger; that was on when I was in high school.”

“Part of being a comic is being flexible, being versatile.”

“Pablo Picasso, Frank Sinatra, Ernest Hemingway, Mel Gibson, Lou Reed, Norman Mailer, Vanessa Redgrave, Van Morrison - each is distinguished by controversies unrelated to his or her art; by many accounts, some of them are not nice people at all.”

“Audit the Fed is a bill that would politicize monetary policy, would bring short-term political pressures to bear on the Fed. In terms of openness about our financial accounts, we are extensively audited.”

“Despite the fact that there was not one shred of evidence that George Zimmerman 'racially profiled' Trayvon Martin, America's liberals have literally taken to the streets to denounce a verdict that was, by all accounts, a just one.”