“There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four year...” — Quentin Crisp Quote

“There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn't get any worse.”

“Sex is the last refuge of the miserable.”

“When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?”

“We are one, after all, you and I, together we suffer, together exist and forever will recreate each other.”

“Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.”

“I did a production of 'Journey's End,' an RC Sherriff play about World War I, at the Edinburgh Festival. I was 18 and it was the first time that people I knew and loved and respected came up to me after the show and said, 'You know, you could really do this if you wanted to.'”