“Life has its trade-offs. As you age, you lose things like teeth and th...” — Alexandra Petri Quote

“Life has its trade-offs. As you age, you lose things like teeth and the ability to play in the ball pit at fast-food restaurants, and you gain things like experience and employer-based health insurance.”

“I swear like a sailor, assuming the sailor in question died in 1800 and was really square.”

“You do not get gold stars for cleaning your toilet. In actual life, there is a depressing lack of stickers.”

“I'm the kind of person that if I try to throw it hard, it doesn't come out as good. So my whole thought process is to stay smooth, stay on top of the ball, and just get my hand out in front.”

“My father, Buddy Robinson, was superchic - a dandy. He always wore dinner jackets at night and espadrilles in the summer, but with his own flair. He was even well dressed when riding a tractor or listening to a ball game on the radio.”

“I had a role in 'DodgeBall,' where I played a pirate who played dodge ball. I'd say 80 to 90 percent of my lines were 'Garrr' or 'Arghh.' And it was all about what the quality of your 'Grr-arr' was.”