“I've had people - I've seen people do routines that I knew they didn't...” — Paul F. Tompkins Quote

“I've had people - I've seen people do routines that I knew they didn't take from me but they had - because for whatever reason I had stopped doing it a long time ago. There's no way they would have heard this bit. But it ends up being pretty much the same thing.”

“Puppets can get away with saying things that human beings can't. Because they are cartoonish just to look at, they're not real, you can assign them insane things to feel and vocalize.”

“You can find nice clothes that suit your style at any number of places - Goodwill, Salvation Army, stores like that. They're all over the place. If you put in the time, you can find good stuff at decent prices.”

“School was unbelievably painful. It was five years of being pretty sad.”

“Being pretty crazy while being chased by the National Enquirer is not good. The British tabloids were the worst.”

“There's nothing wrong with being pretty.”