“Trying to maintain your health on the road can be difficult. Especiall...” — Ron Funches Quote

“Trying to maintain your health on the road can be difficult. Especially in the middle of the country where they close by 9 and you're not out of work until midnight. You end up at a McDonald's or Taco Bell.”

“The worst job I ever had was working as a Lady Liberty sign-twirler for a tax services place, where I'd just dance and have fun. The way I talk about it makes it sounds like a fun job - but then I got a staph infection from the costume. So that was probably the worst part about it.”

“Some of my biggest influences are people like Steven Wright and Todd Berry. I'm a shy person, and I don't think people who aspire to do comedy think that's an option.”

“As to Bell's talking telegraph, it only creates interest in scientific circles... its commercial values will be limited.”

“I used to do bell ringing in Benenden church. It was really good fun, actually. My best friend's dad was the local vicar, and so it was expected as her best friend that I would go to church every Sunday with her.”

“I read The Bell Jar, and then I read her memoir and her diaries, and a third book, an outside opinion. Just the way she made the pillows so neat on the oven door. It just seems to be the opposite of, if you're going to take your life, in a horrible rage it happens.”