“The very first time I did standup, I went to an open mike on the Lower...” — Jessi Klein Quote

“The very first time I did standup, I went to an open mike on the Lower East Side at a place that doesn't exist anymore. And it was one of those open mikes that wasn't really just for comedy.”

“My 20s were all about feeling desperate. Desperate to find a new boyfriend. Desperate to get the perfect job. Desperate to get rid of this terrible relationship with this bad new boyfriend.”

“If I have one wish for my birthday, it is that 35 is the end of desperation and the beginning of acceptance. Part of that is believing that if I'm meant to give birth, I will.”

“I live in east London, but I'm not cool.”

“We know there can be no justice in the Middle East without a Palestinian state. But there can be no security in the Middle East without a Palestinian state.”

“Putin could no more survive returning Crimea to Ukraine than Bibi Netanyahu could survive giving East Jerusalem back to Jordan.”