“I'm crazy about Shakespeare, who was a notorious word inventor. And my...” — Rob Delaney Quote

“I'm crazy about Shakespeare, who was a notorious word inventor. And my wife is an English teacher, and she's hilarious.”

“My stand-up is far more rooted in reality than my Twitter.”

“In real life, I am alarmingly boring.”

“I'm an English teacher, so I'm used to reading and I'm used to reading out loud.”

“I still don't know what I'm going to be. I love acting. I would love to be an English teacher. I would love to be a housewife and have a chateau in the South of France, I would love to be a singer that travels to cafes around different towns.”

“I wanted to be a high school English teacher and I looked like how I do now, but I looked even younger, and I was like, um, 10th graders are really mean and I'm too fragile for this.”