“I won't do something unless I can get at least two or three good laugh...” — Jerry Seinfeld Quote

“I won't do something unless I can get at least two or three good laughs out of it. If I can't, it's not gonna make the team.”

“It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.”

“I like money, but it's never been about the money.”

“I think I became a writer because I used to write letters to my friends, and I used to love writing them. I loved the idea that you can put marks on a page and send it off, and two days later, someone laughs somewhere else in the world.”

“Laughs are always needed.”

“In this life he laughs longest who laughs last.”