“I'm shooting a pilot based on my show. It's a one-camera show. I play ...” — Dane Cook Quote

“I'm shooting a pilot based on my show. It's a one-camera show. I play myself.”

“Christina can sing all the notes, but Britney is just hot!”

“When I'm looking for hot button answers to tough questions, I don't look to congressman or my mayor. I say, 'What would Miss U.S.A. have to say about this?'”

“The only thing that I'm not willing to do is really stupid, horribly written sitcoms. It can be tempting during pilot season time, but I realized this a while ago when I almost signed my life away to a stupid pilot.”

“Look, there might not be a whole lot of people that really can relate to being a fighter pilot. Let's just be honest. But there's a ton of people that can relate to being a mom, because I am doing it right along with them.”

“I'm a commercial pilot before I was an actor.”