“Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - ...” — George Burns Quote

“Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.”

“Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.”

“It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.”

“Love is when the other person's happiness is more important than your own.”

“With Cosmic Ordering you will never eat humble pie again.”

“When it comes down to it, even on the natural plane, it is much happier and more enlivening to love than to be loved.”