Humor Quote by J.K. Rowling — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Do I look stupid?" snarled Uncle Vernon, a bit of fried egg dangling from his bushy mustache.”

“Hermione was screaming again: the sound went through Harry like physical pain.”

“There was a clatter as the basilisk fangs cascaded out of Hermione's arms. Running at Ron, she flung them around his neck and kissed him full on the mouth. Ron threw away the fangs and broomstick he was holding and responded with such enthusiasm that he lifted Hermione off her feet.”

“Do you mean ter tell me," he growled at the Dursleys, "that this boy—this boy!—knows nothin' abou'—about ANYTHING?”

“You see, I, unlike you, have been made a prefect, which means that I, unlike you, have the power to hand out punishments.”

“Human efforts to avoid or overcome death are always doomed to disappointment.”

“Once I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: "No good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.”

“What the hell is that?" I laughed.”

“Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar.”

“What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't move, with no hope of rescue. Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your current circumstances seems more likely, consider how lucky you are that it won't be troubling you much longer.”

“What does ‘hmm’ have to do with anything? Could you ever use more than five words? All this grunting and minced words make you come across—primal.”

“It doesn't matter how fat I get, my online avatars are unchanging.”