Humor Quote by Terry Pratchett — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“THERE IS NO JUSTICE" said Death "JUST ME”

“Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.”

“Death paused. YOU HAVE PERHAPS HEARD THE PHRASE, he said, THAT HELL IS OTHER PEOPLE?”

“Some pirates achieved immortality by great deeds of cruelty or derring-do. Some achieved immortality by amassing great wealth. But the captain had long ago decided that he would, on the whole, prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.”

“This isn't life in the fast lane, it's life in the oncoming traffic.”

“This is very similar to the suggestion put forward by the Quirmian philosopher Ventre, who said, "Possibly the gods exist, and possibly they do not. So why not believe in them in any case? If it's all true you'll go to a lovely place when you die, and if it isn't then you've lost nothing, right?" When he died he woke up in a circle of gods holding nasty-looking sticks and one of them said, "We're going to show you what we think of Mr Clever Dick in these parts...”

“Find something useful to do with your morning,' she thought to him as she neared her chambers. 'Do something heroic in front of an audience. Knock a child into a river while no one's looking and then rescue him.”

“...I doubt very seriously whether anyone will hire me.'”

“I have to go. I have a finite amount of life left and I don't want to spend it arguing with you.”

“An empty stomach is not a good political adviser.”

“You can only be in a bad mood for so long before you have to face up to the fact that it isn't a bad mood at all; it's just your sucky personality.”

“Do you love him?”