Humor Quote by Mark Twain — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.”

“There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.”

“There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded.”

“It usually takes me two or three days to prepare an impromptu speech.”

“Whoever is happy will make others happy, too.”

“To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.”

“Laurel, David? Would you like to share the joke with the rest of the class?" he asked, one hand on his skinny hip.”

“Do you mean ter tell me," he growled at the Dursleys, "that this boy—this boy!—knows nothin' abou'—about ANYTHING?”

“Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.”

“The world isn't fair, Calvin.”

“Books can also provoke emotions. And emotions sometimes are even more troublesome than ideas. Emotions have led people to do all sorts of things they later regret-like, oh, throwing a book at someone else.”

“Breeze strolled over to the table and chose a seat with his characteristic decorum. The portly man raised his dueling cane, pointing it at Ham. 'I see that my period of intellectual respite has come to an end.'”