Humor Quote by Lily Tomlin — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.”

“I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.”

“The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.”

“I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.”

“I said "Somebody should do something about that." Then I realized I am somebody.”

“Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that's the truth.”

“It's a dirty way to fight, but I'm late for lunch.”

“Fire wants to burn”

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”

“It's now very common to hear people say, 'I'm rather offended by that.' As if that gives them certain rights. It's actually nothing more... than a whine. 'I find that offensive.' It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. 'I am offended by that.' Well, so fucking what.”

“The Princess Andromeda?”

“The merest accident of microgeography had meant that the first man to hear the voice of Om, and who gave Om his view of humans, was a shepherd and not a goatherd. They have quite different ways of looking at the world, and the whole of history might have been different. For sheep are stupid, and have to be driven. But goats are intelligent, and need to be led.”