Humor Quote by Daniel Handler — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“This is how it is in life and love. In life and love we are with people for a while, and then we join other people, people we have not met, and we walk with them, and we leave behind all the things we used to be. Sometimes we leave people behind too... This happens everyday. Everyday this happens and scarcely anybody cares.”

“This is like a cookie, it tastes like a cookie having sex with a doughnut.”

“Jace perched on the windowsill and looked down at him. "You really don't get this bodyguard thing, do you?”

“Why?' is always the most difficult question to answer. You know where you are when someone asks you 'What's the time?' or 'When was the battle of 1066?' or 'How do these seatbelts work that go tight when you slam the brakes on, Daddy?' The answers are easy and are, respectively, 'Seven-thirty in the evening,' 'Ten-fifteen in the morning,' and 'Don't ask stupid questions.”

“Unless you stop him. Perhaps next we meet.”

“Another relative?” Valek asked.”

“I have a head for business and a body for sin. Unfortunately, the sin appears to be gluttony.”

“Nobody's ever asked me to a party before, as a friend. Is that why you dyed your eyebrow, for the party? Should I do mine too?”