Humor Quote by Douglas Adams — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Ford carried on counting quietly. This is about the most aggressive thing you can do to a computer, the equivalent of going up to a human being and saying "Blood...blood...blood...blood...”

“What's up?" [asked Ford.]”

“My capacity for happiness," he added, "you could fit into a matchbox without taking out the matches first”

“He's spending a year dead for tax reasons.”

“Curiously enough, the only thing that went through the mind of the bowl of petunias as it fell was Oh no, not again. Many people have speculated that if we knew exactly why the bowl of petunias had thought that we would know a lot more about the nature of the Universe than we do now.”

“Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.”

“I'm making a list”

“That's a sweet piece," said Jean, briefly forgetting to be aggravated. "You didn't snatch that off a street.”

“No. Absolutely not.'”

“It took teams of LEP warlocks to slow down time for a few hours; the magic required to open a door to the tunnel was stupendous. It would be easier to shoot down the moon.”

“One glance and I knew exactly who and what he was. The classic alpha male, the kind who had spurred evolution forward about five million years ago by nailing every female in sight. They charmed, seduced, and behaved like bastards, and yet women were biologically incapable of resisting their magic DNA.”

“I was talking aloud to myself. A habit of the old: they choose the wisest person present to speak to”