“When people look and decide they have nothing in common with me - I'm ...” — Jim Gaffigan Quote

“When people look and decide they have nothing in common with me - I'm 43, balding, blond, whatever - there's something absolutely invigorating about winning them over. Even if it's eight people from Sweden who don't understand what I'm talking about.”

“Manhattan's probably one of the bluest parts in the country, and Indiana's definitely one of the redder states. I have sympathy for both sides.”

“I'm from Indiana. I know what you're thinking, Indiana... Mafia. But in Indiana it's not like New York where everyone's like, 'We're from New York and we're the best' or 'We're from Texas and we like things big' it's more like 'We're from Indiana and we're gonna move.'”

“My natural color is dark blond, but right now I like being a brunette. I did a movie last summer and they dyed my hair platinum - I hated it.”

“I'm into blond men.”

“I catch an old 'Morse' on ITV3. I've never thought I looked particularly like my son. He's taller than me and blond. But when I see Lewis walk into a room with John Thaw, it's like my son has just come onto the screen. That's very strange indeed!”