Best Wit Quotes to Inspire, Uplift & Motivate You Every Day

“What good is it if they miss your face but not your mind?”

“The poet is a faker / Who's so good at his act / He even fakes the pain / Of pain he feels in fact.”

“True Wit is Nature to advantage dress'd”

“There are two ways to dislike poetry: One is to dislike it; the other is to read Pope.”

“A poet should be so crafty with words that he is envied even for his pains.”

“... fantasy is not practice for what is real—fantasy is the opiate of women.”

“He wasn't aware of it but when he smiled he looked like an amiable bear. When he didn't smile he didn't look amiable”

“When men have come to the edge of a precipice, it is the lover of life who has the spirit to leap backwards, and only the pessimist who continues to believe in progress.”

“You can't fight hatred with hatred and expect anyone to listen to you. You can only try to lessen it with humor, wit, truth and commonsense. If that doesn't work run like hell, while they throw rocks at you.”

“Risk sweetens enterprise,’ he answered, ‘and wit can conquer it.”

“If I knew then what I know now, by now I probably wouldn't know it.”

“I'd rather have less time than I think, than less think than I have time.”

“A dog only urinates on that which stands firm.”

“Vivid simplicity is the articulation, the nature of genius. Wisdom is greater than intelligence; intelligence is greater than philosobabble.”

“Art is art. You can take it or leave it. Liking it or not liking it does not make you a better person, and who you like or dislike results in the same thing.”

“I did not know that mankind were suffering for want of gold. I have seen a little of it. I know that it is very malleable, but not so malleable as wit. A grain of gold will gild a great surface, but not so much as a grain of wisdom.”

“Snobbery might sometimes look cool, like smoking, but the end result is usually a repelling one.”

“I would rather be able to appreciate things I cannot have than to have things I am not able to appreciate.”

“I’ll admit, Jasnah, that I empathize with your skepticism, but I don’t agree with it. I just think you've been looking for God in the wrong places.”

“You can con God and get away with it, Granny said, if you do so with charm and wit. If you live your life with imagination and verve, God will play along just to see what outrageously entertaining thing you'll do next.”

“Darwinism teaches that whatever serves no purpose gradually perishes. The tail disappeared long ago; it seems that in some individuals, the brain has now taken an extended leave.”

“One says the things which one feels the need to say, and which the other will not understand: one speaks for oneself alone.”

“If you change who you are to suit other people, you may end up dressed for the wrong occasion”

“Digression is the soul of wit. Take the philosophic asides away from Dante, Milton or Hamlet's father's ghost and what stays is dry bones.”

“Don't explain computers to laymen. Simpler to explain sex to a virgin.”

“Enough about my beauty," Buttercup said. "Everybody always talks about how beautiful I am. I've got a mind, Westley. Talk about that.”

“Give the People what they want - and they'll get what they deserve.”

“Wit seduces by signaling intelligence without nerdiness.”

“Men are not nearly as evolved as women are, nor as intelligent, evidently”

“I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead, Spencer is dead, so is Milton, so is Shakespeare, and I’m not feeling so well myself.”