Humor Quote by Douglas Adams — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“He's spending a year dead for tax reasons.”

“I don't accept the currently fashionable assertion that any view is automatically as worthy of respect as any equal and opposite view. My view is that the moon is made of rock. If someone says to me 'Well, you haven't been there, have you? You haven't seen it for yourself, so my view that it is made of Norwegian Beaver Cheese is equally valid' - then I can't even be bothered to argue. There is such a thing as the burden of proof, and in the case of god, as in the case of the composition of the moon, this has shifted radically. God used to be the best explanation we'd got, and we've now got vastly better ones. God is no longer an explanation of anything, but has instead become something that would itself need an insurmountable amount of explaining. So I don't think that being convinced that there is no god is as irrational or arrogant a point of view as belief that there is. I don't think the matter calls for even-handedness at all.”

“One of the major problems encountered in time travel is not that of becoming your own father or mother. There is no problem in becoming your own father or mother that a broad-minded and well-adjusted family can't cope with. There is no problem with changing the course of history—the course of history does not change because it all fits together like a jigsaw. All the important changes have happened before the things they were supposed to change and it all sorts itself out in the end.”

“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”

“On some days you get what you want, and on others, you get what you need.”

“I had learned that you should always shout louder than your aggressor.”

“Bishops move diagonally. That's why they often turn up where the kings don't expect them to be.”

“It was one thing to snuggle a little when the world seemed about to end, and quite another to explain to her parents that she wanted to date an ancient magical horse.”

“The reason people use a crucifix against vampires is because vampires are allergic to bullshit.”

“I still don't belong to anyone - I am mine.”