Humor Quote by Janet Evanovich — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“If I gave you a pity position it wouldn't be in my office.”

“Ranger locked eyes with me. "Please," he said.”

“Men drive off bridges and drink too much because of women like you.”

“I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble.”

“I don't need handcuffs to enslave a woman." -Ranger to Stephanie”

“Excuse me?" I said, palms down on the Formica tabletop. "Coffee? I thought we came here for pie." "I don't eat the kind of pie they serve here." I felt a flash of heat go through my stomach. I knew firsthand the kind of pie Ranger liked.”

“She'd met Colin on a Monday.”

“How do you fight someone smarter than yourself?' Rand Whispered. 'The answer is simple. You make her think that you are sitting down across the table from her, ready to play her game. Then you punch her in the face as hard as you can.”

“You show me a lazy prick who's lying in bed all day, watching TV, only occasionally getting up to piss, and I'll show you a guy who's not causing any trouble.”

“I love mankind ... it's people I can't stand!!”

“Yeah, but the lost diadem," said Michael Corner, rolling his eyes, "is”

“You can knock on a deaf man's door forever.”