Humor Quote by Janet Evanovich — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“If I gave you a pity position it wouldn't be in my office.”

“Is that a bulletproof vest? See, now that's so insulting. That's like saying I'm not smart enough to shoot you in the head.”

“Men drive off bridges and drink too much because of women like you.”

“Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying around for those times when the peanut butter of life gets stuck to the roof of your mouth.”

“Ranger locked eyes with me. "Please," he said.”

“He [Ranger] peeled my [Stephanie] clothes off and wrangled me into bed. And then suddenly he was inside me. He once told me that time spent with him would ruin me for all other men. When he said it, I thought it was an outrageous threat. I no longer though it outrageous.”

“Hello Dad! It is now three in the morning. Do you know where I am?”

“I like to have a martini,”

“We spend money that we do not have, on things we do not need, to impress people who do not care.”

“You fuck - you ate my cat!”

“Fortunately, among werewolf women, the word "bitch" is not offensive. I was having a lot of fun with that.”

“When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.”