Humor Quote by Wodehouse — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“There is only one cure for grey hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.”

“I mean to say, I know perfectly well that I've got, roughly speaking, half the amount of brain a normal bloke ought to possess. And when a girl comes along who has about twice the regular allowance, she too often makes a bee line for me with the love light in her eyes. I don't know how to account for it, but it is so.”

“What ho!" I said.”

“We spend the first 12 months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next 12 months teaching them to sit down and shut up.”

“What's this?" he demanded, looking from Clary to his companions, as if they might know what she was doing there.”

“Anyone who knew the word slattern was worth cultivating as a friend.”

“The Prince found Buttercup waiting unhappily outside his chamber doors.”

“I love writing, but hate starting. The page is awfully white and it says, 'You may have fooled some of the people some of the time but those days are over, Giftless. I'm not your agent and I'm not your mommy: I'm a white piece of paper. You wanna dance with me?' and I really, really don't. I'll go peaceable-like.”

“The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, the effect of which is like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.”