Humor Quote by Terry Pratchett — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”

“God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players [i.e. everybody], to being involved in an obscure and complex variant of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who”

“Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.”

“YOU'RE ONLY PUTTING OFF THE INEVITABLE, he said.”

“It was sad music. But it waved its sadness like a battle flag. It said the universe had done all it could, but you were still alive.”

“Do you understand what I'm saying?”

“There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that a concern for one's safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to. Yossarian was moved very deeply by the absolute simplicity of this clause of Catch-22 and let out a respectful whistle.”

“Hell may have all the best composers, but heaven has all the best choreographers.”

“Halt you villains! Unhand that science!”

“Instant gratification takes too long.”

“Can you be a girl for a few seconds?”

“You deal with mythological stuff for a few years, you learn that paradises are usually places where you get killed.”