Humor Quote by Diana Wynne Jones — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“If you're thinking of calling on that Mrs. Pentstemmon, you can save yourself the trouble. The old biddy's dead.”

“You have an instinct, Sophie, that's how," said Howl. "Nothing is safe from you. If I were to court a girl who lived on an iceberg in the middle of the ocean, sooner or later—probably sooner—I'd look up to see you swooping overhead on a broomstick. In fact, by now I'd be disappointed in you if I”

“What a strange family you are! Is your name Lettie too?”

“Nothing is safe from you. If I were to court a girl who lived on an iceberg in the middle of the ocean, sooner or later— probably sooner— I’d look up to see you swooping overhead on a broomstick. In fact, by now I’d be disappointed in you if I didn’t see you.”

“So you were going to rescue the Prince! Why did you pretend to run away? To deceive the Witch?”

“This book will prove the following ten facts:”

“So please, oh please, we beg, we pray,”

“That's a sweet piece," said Jean, briefly forgetting to be aggravated. "You didn't snatch that off a street.”

“I'm a big believer in putting things off, In fact, I even put off procrastinating.”

“Neither were you [born yesterday], unless of course I am wrong, in which case welcome to the world, little baby, and congratulations on learning to read so early in life.”

“When beetles fight these battles in a bottle with their paddles”

“I've begun worshipping the sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the sun. It's there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, and a lovely day. There's no mystery, no one asks for money, I don't have to dress up, and there's no boring pageantry. And interestingly enough, I have found that the prayers I offer to the sun and the prayers I formerly offered to 'God' are all answered at about the same 50% rate.”