Humor Quote by Mark Twain — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“The weakest of all weak things is a virtue which has not been tested in the fire.”

“So I learned then, that gold in it's native state is but dull, unornamental stuff, and that only low-born metals excite the admiration of the ignorant with an ostentatious glitter. However, like the rest of the world, I still go underrating men of gold and glorifying men of mica. Commonplace human nature cannot rise above that.”

“What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.”

“Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.”

“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”

“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”

“Harry, don't go picking a row with Malfoy, don't forget, he's a prefect now, he could make life difficult for you...”

“Five syllables," Apollo said, counting them on his fingers. "That would be real bad.”

“Babe!”

“I'm not absolutely certain of my facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare -- or, if not, it's some equally brainy lad -- who says that it's always just when a chappie is feeling particularly top-hole, and more than usually braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with a bit of lead piping.”

“I bet," said Mulch, "that you would set the world on fire just to watch it burn.”

“Maybe he thinks he can rescue me? No one is that stupid.”