Humor Quote by Douglas Adams — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“You cannot see what I see because you see what you see. You cannot know what I know because you know what you know. What I see and what I know cannot be added to what you see and what you know because they are not of the same kind. Neither can it replace what you see and what you know, because that would be to replace you yourself.”

“He's spending a year dead for tax reasons.”

“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”

“And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before--and thus was the Empire forged.”

“Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?”

“One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit of continually stating and repeating the very very obvious.”

“I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.”

“It was sad music. But it waved its sadness like a battle flag. It said the universe had done all it could, but you were still alive.”

“See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.”

“When God Created Mothers”

“Men don’t realize that if we’re sleeping with them on the first date, we’re probably not interested in seeing them again either.”

“Sebastian just smiled. “I could hear your heart beating,” he said softly. “When you were watching me with Valentine. Did it bother you?”