Humor Quote by J.K. Rowling — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Yeah, but the lost diadem," said Michael Corner, rolling his eyes, "is”

“Why are you worrying about YOU-KNOW-WHO, when you should be worrying about YOU-NO-POO? The constipation sensation that's gripping the nation!”

“Harry Potter," he said very softly. His voice might have been part of the spitting fire. "The Boy Who Lived.”

“There was a clatter as the basilisk fangs cascaded out of Hermione's arms. Running at Ron, she flung them around his neck and kissed him full on the mouth. Ron threw away the fangs and broomstick he was holding and responded with such enthusiasm that he lifted Hermione off her feet.”

“Now, you two – this year, you behave yourselves. If I get one more owl telling me you've – you've blown up a toilet or –”

“I don't think you should be an Auror, Harry," said Luna unexpectedly. Everybody looked at her. "The Aurors are part of the Rotfang Conspiracy, I thought everyone knew that. They're working to bring down the Ministry of Magic from within using a mixture of dark magic and gum disease.”

“When someone leaves you, apart from missing them, apart from the fact that the whole little world you've created together collapses, and that everything you see or do reminds you of them, the worst is the thought that they tried you out and, in the end, the whole sum of parts adds up to you got stamped REJECT by the one you love. How can you not be left with the personal confidence of a passed over British Rail sandwich?”

“No one can be right all the time, but it helps to be right most of the time.”

“If you are good life is good.”

“Get there early because hope does not park your mother-fucking car.”

“I don't know why it should be, I am sure; but the sight of another man asleep in bed when I am up, maddens me.”

“Why?' is always the most difficult question to answer. You know where you are when someone asks you 'What's the time?' or 'When was the battle of 1066?' or 'How do these seatbelts work that go tight when you slam the brakes on, Daddy?' The answers are easy and are, respectively, 'Seven-thirty in the evening,' 'Ten-fifteen in the morning,' and 'Don't ask stupid questions.”