Humor Quote by George Carlin — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely?”

“Meow” means “woof” in cat.”

“Some people see things that are and ask, Why?”

“Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.”

“It's never just a game when you're winning.”

“The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.”

“People say, 'I'm going to sleep now,' as if it were nothing. But it's really a bizarre activity. 'For the next several hours, while the sun is gone, I'm going to become unconscious, temporarily losing command over everything I know and understand. When the sun returns, I will resume my life.'”

“See?” I’d whispered to Bones, nudging him with a grin. “He never argues with her. Isn’t that sweet?”

“Really, I'm trying to care, Artemis, really. But I thought it was all supposed to be over when the fat lady sings. Well, she's singing, but it doesn't appear to be over”

“Life is like a box of chocolates.”

“Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.”

“You just noticed? You're slow...”