Humor Quote by Richelle Mead — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Stop fighting me!" he said, trying to pull on the arm he held.”

“What's up?" I asked.”

“Yeah? Can you draw a skeleton riding a motorcycle with flames coming out of it? And I want a pirate hat on the skeleton. And a parrot on his shoulder. A skeleton parrot. Or maybe a ninja skeleton parrot? No, that would be overkill. But it'd be cool if the biker skeleton could be shooting some ninja throwing stars. That are on fire.”

“It was a lame excuse, and I knew that wasn't the reason he was canceling. If he wanted to avoid me, I would have preferred he made up something about how he and the other guardians had to up Moroi security or practice top-secret ninja moves.”

“When we were almost to the other campus, I felt the weird nausea hit me. I called a warning to Christian, just as a Strigoi grabbed him. But Christian was fast. Flames wreathed the Strigoi's head. He screamed and released Christian, trying frantically to put the flames out. The Strigoi never saw me coming with the stake. The whole thing took under a minute. Christian and I exchanged looks.”

“What do you read, Westbay? Romance novels?” She said it like reading romance was on par with chronic farting.”

“Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”

“It is happy for you that you possess the talent of flattering with delicacy. May I ask whether these pleasing attentions proceed from the impulse of the moment, or are they the result of previous study?”

“I wanted to wake you straightaway, but I knew I had to wait several hours to ensure you were safely recovered.”

“Opinions are like onions. They spell similarly, usually have many layers, and tend to make people cry.”

“I thought it sounded a bit like Percy singing... maybe you've got to attack him while he's in the shower, Harry.”