Humor Quote by Jon Stewart — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena.”

“Get there early because hope does not park your mother-fucking car.”

“Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.”

“The internet is just a world passing notes around a classroom.”

“If we amplify everything, we hear nothing.”

“Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.”

“It’s fascinating. You know all these words, and they’re all English, but when you string them together into sentences, they just don’t make any sense.”

“If writers wrote as carelessly as some people talk, then adhasdh asdglaseuyt[bn[ pasdlgkhasdfasdf.”

“Whew! You two are blowing hotter air than a tornado circlin’ a volcano in Hades.”

“I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.”

“I stared at him (Dionysus). "You're...you're married? But I thought you got in trouble for chasing a wood nymph-”