Humor Quote by Darynda Jones — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“In a moment of sheer terror, I realized I couldn't feel my brain. It was there just a minute ago. Maybe I really was dead. "Do I look dead to you?”

“After a long pause in which he took the time to blink several times, he asked, "You named your breasts?”

“Want coffee?" I asked, as I headed that way.”

“I was never really certain why he scared the bejesus out of me. Nothing scared me growing up. I’ve been playing with dead people since the day I was born, so it’s good thing, yet the Big Bad scared me. Which brings me to the reason I called.”

“I do not," I felt oddly appalled by her statement. "I'm an excellent liar. Ask my dentist. He swears I floss regularly.”

“You know you have ADD when Look A chicken - T-shirt”

“*Appendix usually means "small outgrowth from large intestine," but in this case it means "additional information accompanying main text." Or are those really the same things? Think carefully before you insult this book.”

“Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.”

“And I thought that all those little kids are going to grow up someday. And all of those little kids are going to do the things that we do. And they will all kiss someone someday. But for now, sledding is enough. I think it would be great if sledding were always enough, but it isn't.”

“Ayame: "Yuki, let's deepen the bond between us brothers!”

“A genius. A criminal mastermind. A millionaire. And he is only twelve years old.”

“It's now very common to hear people say, 'I'm rather offended by that.' As if that gives them certain rights. It's actually nothing more... than a whine. 'I find that offensive.' It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. 'I am offended by that.' Well, so fucking what.”