Humor Quote by Gail Carriger — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Well, my love,” said Alexia with prodigious daring to Lord Maccon, “shall we?” The earl started to move forward and then stopped abruptly and looked down at her, not moving at all. “Am I?”

“The ill-informed masses included her own family among their ranks, a family that specialized in being both inconvenient and asinine.”

“I never gossip. I observe. And then relay my observations to practically everyone.”

“Faith was enjoying her evening, the looming presence of Major Channing notwithstanding. He seemed to swoop in at odd times, presenting her with a glass of punch or distracting her from her conversation by glowering fiercely. She noticed that if she paid any one gentleman too much attention for too long a time, the major would make himself known. Then he would disappear and ignore her once more.”

“My”

“How ghastly for her, people actually thinking, with their brains, and right next door. Oh, the travesty of it all.”

“I’m going to tell you something once and then whether you die is strictly up to you," Westley said, lying pleasantly on the bed. "What I’m going to tell you is this: drop your sword, and if you do, then I will leave with this baggage here"—he glanced at Buttercup—"and you will be tied up but not fatally, and will be free to go about your business. And if you choose to fight, well, then, we will not both leave alive.”

“Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.”

“So--what's it like, being a vampire?”

“Someday is not a day of the week.”

“I'm sorry. I use my rapier wit to hide my inner pain.”

“There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words.”