Humor Quote by Gail Carriger — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“I never gossip. I observe. And then relay my observations to practically everyone.”

“Faith was enjoying her evening, the looming presence of Major Channing notwithstanding. He seemed to swoop in at odd times, presenting her with a glass of punch or distracting her from her conversation by glowering fiercely. She noticed that if she paid any one gentleman too much attention for too long a time, the major would make himself known. Then he would disappear and ignore her once more.”

“Well, my love,” said Alexia with prodigious daring to Lord Maccon, “shall we?” The earl started to move forward and then stopped abruptly and looked down at her, not moving at all. “Am I?”

“How ghastly for her, people actually thinking, with their brains, and right next door. Oh, the travesty of it all.”

“You do realise modern social mores exist for a reason?”

“She filed the image away as an excellent and insulting question to ask the earl at an utterly inappropriate future moment.”

“So be sure when you step, Step with care and great tact. And remember that life's A Great Balancing Act. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ¾ percent guaranteed) Kid, you'll move mountains.”

“Every one suspects himself of at least one of the cardinal virtues, and this is mine: I am one of the few honest people that I have ever known.”

“You should try not to talk so much, friend. You'll sound far less stupid that way.”

“Babe!”

“Don't explain computers to laymen. Simpler to explain sex to a virgin.”

“It’s like this…a starving man would gladly eat a radish, right? In fact, a radish would be a feast if that’s all he had. But if he had a buffet in front of him, the radish would never be chosen.”