Humor Quote by George Carlin — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.”

“I think I am, therefore, I am... I think.”

“Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.”

“I, myself, have killed six people. All random, all undetected, no way to trace them to me. And, let me tell you, there's nothin' like it. It's a great feeling. Yeah, I know, you're thinking. 'Aw, he's a comedian. He's just sayin' that stuff.' Good. That's exactly what I want you to think.”

“Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.”

“If everyone in the world sat quietly at the same time, closed their eyes and concentrated as hard as they could on peace and goodwill, all the killing and cruelty in the world would continue. And probably increase.”

“He’s always asking: ‘Is that new? I haven’t seen that before.’ It’s like, Why don’t you mind your own business? Solve world hunger. Get out of my closet.”

“Rule number 2 - don't listen to me!" Arriane laughed, "I'm certifiably insane!”

“You did not just say that. I have a feeling we're on the verge of hugging and coming up with cute nicknames for each other.”

“Some people see things that are and ask, Why?”

“If you're trapped in the dream of the Other, you're fucked.”

“Because he has the best equipment in the City and he knows how to use it!”