Humor Quote by Bill Watterson — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did?”

“Yakka foob mog. Grug pubbawup zink wattoom gazork. Chumble spuzz. I love loopholes.”

“In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.”

“I'm a 21st-century kid trapped in a 19th-century family.”

“Years from now, when I'm successful and happy, ...and he's in prison... I hope I'm not too mature to gloat.”

“As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway.”

“If you have ever seen a dragon in a pinch, you will realize that this was only poetical exaggeration applied to any hobbit, even to Old Took's great-grand-uncle Bullroarer, who was so huge (for a hobbit) that he could ride a horse. He charged the ranks of the goblins of Mount Gram in the Battle of the Green Fields, and knocked their king Golfimbul's head clean off with a wooden club. It sailed a hundred yards through the air and went down a rabbit-hole, and in this way the battle was won and the game of Golf invented at the same moment.”

“Hercules,huh? Percy frowned. "That guy was like the Starbucks of Ancient Greece. Everywhere you turn--there he is.”

“An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it makes a better soup.”

“Hey, our hair's the same color," I said, eying us side by side in the mirror.”

“The two most beautiful words in the English language are 'check enclosed.”

“The thing I hate the most about advertising is that it attracts all the bright, creative and ambitious young people, leaving us mainly with the slow and self-obsessed to become our artists.. Modern art is a disaster area. Never in the field of human history has so much been used by so many to say so little.”