Humor Quote by Groucho Marx — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.”

“Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while”

“I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.”

“Before I speak, I have something important to say.”

“Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well I have others.”

“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”

“Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.”

“Are you sleepwalking?' A voice asked behind me.”

“Another relative?” Valek asked.”

“People usually asked her if she had a belly button. Of course she had a belly button. She couldn't explain how. She didn't really want to know.”

“I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re skeptical.”

“It is often argued that religion is valuable because it makes men good, but even if this were true it would not be a proof that religion is true. That would be an extension of pragmatism beyond endurance. Santa Claus makes children good in precisely the same way, and yet no one would argue seriously that the fact proves his existence. The defense of religion is full of such logical imbecilities. The theologians, taking one with another, are adept logicians, but every now and then they have to resort to sophistries so obvious that their whole case takes on an air of the ridiculous. Even the most logical religion starts out with patently false assumptions. It is often argued in support of this or that one that men are so devoted to it that they are willing to die for it. That, of course, is as silly as the Santa Claus proof. Other men are just as devoted to manifestly false religions, and just as willing to die for them. Every theologian spends a large part of his time and energy trying to prove that religions for which multitudes of honest men have fought and died are false, wicked, and against God.”