Humor Quote by Terry Pratchett — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“We are here and it is now. The way I see it is, after that, everything tends towards guesswork.”

“And then Jack chopped down what was the world's last beanstalk, adding murder and ecological terrorism to the theft, enticement, and trespass charges already mentioned, and all the giant's children didn't have a daddy anymore. But he got away with it and lived happily ever after, without so much as a guilty twinge about what he had done...which proves that you can be excused for just about anything if you are a hero, because no one asks inconvenient questions.”

“The truth may be out there, but the lies are inside your head.”

“You can't give her that!' she screamed. 'It's not safe!'”

“It struck Mort with sudden, terrible poignancy that Death must be the loneliest creature in the universe. In the great party of Creation, he was always in the kitchen.”

“Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.”

“25 And the Lord spake unto the Angel that guarded the eastern gate, saying 'Where is the flaming sword that was given unto thee?'”

“What's the point of being a grown-up if you don't get to be immature?”

“My muscles informed me they did not want to go through any more exercise today. So I suggest that maybe he should let me off this time. He laughed, and I'm pretty sure it was at me...not with me.”

“I'm calling it the Watney Triangle because after what I've been through, shit on Mars should be named after me.”

“Molly: So how do you think of Bryce Hamilton crowd so far? Boys hot enough for you?”

“Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.”