Humor Quote by Jeff Kinney — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“There was this book Dad used to read to me every night called "The Giving Tree." It was a really good book, but the back of it had a picture of the author, this guy named Shel Silverstein.”

“Monkeys can't talk, stupid!”

“Zoo-Wee Mama!”

“I'm not really sure what makes a book a 'classic' to begin with, but I think it has to be at least fifty years old and some person or animal has to die at the end.”

“What a strange family you are! Is your name Lettie too?”

“We were just looking at maps...”

“Unseen in the background, Fate was quietly slipping lead into the boxing-glove.”

“Marry me, he says. I got all my own teeth, I wash twice a year an I'll cut you in fer half the business here.”

“Dear Teens at Starbucks wearing 'Abstain from Sex 2 Attain Ur Goals' t-shirts: Doesn't it depend on what my goals are?”

“I'm told I have the body of a god.”