Humor Quote by Ilona Andrews — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“She surveyed the carnage behind him. "Did you have fun?”

“I can't give you the white picket fence, and if I did, you'd set it on fire.”

“What’s this”

“I've never created a riot before. I did cause a brawl at the last formal. A large number of young women there actually arrived with the expectation of seducing me into matrimony, and a couple of their mothers came to blows. It was hilari—I mean, dreadful. Simply dreadful.”

“Just wait until he figures out I shut him out of his slut hut.”

“Help me, I can’t breathe, your ego is pushing all the air out of the room.”

“When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone.”

“It crosses my mind that Cinna's calm and normal demeanor masks a complete madman.”

“I was a little excited but mostly blorft. "Blorft" is an adjective I just made up that means 'Completely overwhelmed but proceeding as if everything is fine and reacting to the stress with the torpor of a possum.' I have been blorft every day for the past seven years.”

“She talks like you. It’s not every day you hear a four-year-old say Prince Charming is a douchebag who’s only holding Cinderella back.”

“Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.”

“When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.”