Humor Quote by Ilona Andrews — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Just wait until he figures out I shut him out of his slut hut.”

“She surveyed the carnage behind him. "Did you have fun?”

“Did he just rip out the engine?" I asked.”

“I ripped my left arm out of his hand and slammed my elbow into his solar plexus. He exhaled in a gasp. I lunged for the dagger and sat on top of him, my knees pinning his arms, my dagger on his throat.”

“I can't give you the white picket fence, and if I did, you'd set it on fire.”

“It seems that the young woman made some indelicate suggestion of a threesome...When I got there, Miss Nash was standing by the hot tub in a small bikini, pointing the business end of a SIG-Sauer P-226 at her fella and concerned members of the hotel staff, while dunking the scantily clad female's head under the water and asking, "Who's diving for clams now, bitch?”

“Easy. Peasy”

“He couldn’t see why people made such a fuss about people eating their silly old fruit anyway, but life would be a lot less fun if they didn’t. And there was never an apple, in Adam’s opinion, that wasn’t worth the trouble you got into for eating it.”

“When red-headed people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn.”

“He f**ks even better than he looks”, I settled on saying. Several heads turned. I didn’t care; I was pissed. “And that beautiful face is going to be clamped between my legs as soon as we get home, don’t you worry.”

“What?" Jace was still staring at her as if she'd told him she'd found one of the Silent Brothers doing nude cartwheels in the hallway.”

“Most men don't seem to get that telling a pissed-off woman to calm down is like throwing gunpowder on a fire.”