Humor Quote by Terry Pratchett — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual.”

“Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH', the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.”

“Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar.”

“I get it,' said the prisoner. 'Good Cop, Bad Cop, eh?'”

“But is all this true?" said Brutha.”

“Bishops move diagonally. That's why they often turn up where the kings don't expect them to be.”

“Sometimes losing a pet is more painful than losing a human because in the case of the pet, you were not pretending to love it.”

“Alice laughed. 'There's no use trying,' she said. 'One can't believe impossible things.'”

“Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.”

“May the New Year bring you courage to break your resolutions early! My own plan is to swear off every kind of virtue, so that I triumph even when I fall!”

“Earrings are like orgasms. You can never have too many.”

“And, whoa!" He turned to Mr.D. "Your the wine dude? No way!”