Humor Quote by Demetri Martin — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Sort of' is such a harmless thing to say... sort of. It's just a filler. Sort of... it doesn't really mean anything. But after certain things, sort of means everything. Like... after "I love you"... or "You're going to live"... or "It's a boy!”

“Electricity is really just organized lightning”

“Nozy Cat lifted one sleepy eyelid, and his marble blue eye glared at her for interrupting his sacred nap. He wore a yellow collar with little red stars printed on it. His second eyelid also opened, and he gave them his irritated blue-eyed glare.”

“You teach combat, I guess.”

“Gym should be illegal. It's humiliating.”

“Kids. You gotta love them. I adore children. A little salt, a squeeze of lemon—perfect.”

“It was beautiful in a harsh I'm-going-to-gut-you-like-a-fish kind of way.”