Humor Quote by Terry Pratchett — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Studies have shown that an ant can carry one hundred times its own weight, but there is no known limit to the lifting power of the average tiny eighty-year-old Spanish peasant grandmother.”

“Death: "THERE ARE BETTER THINGS IN THE WORLD THAN ALCOHOL, ALBERT.”

“YOU'RE ONLY PUTTING OFF THE INEVITABLE, he said.”

“There are hardly any excesses of the most crazed psychopath that cannot easily be duplicated by a normal kindly family man who just comes in to work every day and has a job to do.”

“Things that try to look like things often do look more like things than things.”

“We who think we are about to die will laugh at anything.”

“You rush a miracle worker, you get lousy miracles!”

“Because he has the best equipment in the City and he knows how to use it!”

“rolf! what? are you really rolling on the floor laughing? well, please stay down there for a sec while I KICK YOUR ASS.”

“Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There is too much fraternizing with the enemy.”

“Now we're going to save a bunch of dirty meatsacks from a bunch of dirty cannibals? Why don't we rescue some orphaned kittens and put food out for stray puppies while we're at it?”

“Hey Susie Derkins, is that your face, or is a 'possum stuck in your collar?”