Humor Quote by James Patterson — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Well, that's an evil smile...”

“Q: You'er presented with a smooth-faced, eight-foot-high wooden wall. Your objective? Get over it. To, like, save comrades or something. How to accomplish this?”

“Basically, I have two speeds.... Hostile or smart-aleck. Your choice.”

“Marty, my mother used to say "Never get greedy with God." I think what she meant was "Don't dare ask for more if you already have what you need."”

“Yes, Max, you are going to die. Just like everybody else.”

“How did you become blind, uh, Jeff is it?”

“I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed.”

“When I buy a new book, I always read the last page first, that way in case I die before I finish, I know how it ends. That, my friend, is a dark side.”

“I wouldn't even consider it if I were you. But then if I were you, I would not be me, and if I were not me, I would not be able to advise you, and if I were unable to advise you, you'd do as you like, so you might as well do as you like and have done with it.”

“Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”

“Life is tough, then you die.”

“If I'm walking on thin ice, I might as well dance my way across.”