Humor Quote by James Patterson — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Some kids get called 'bundles of joy' or 'slices of heaven' or 'dreams come true.' We got 'the fifty-fourth generation of DNA experiments.' Doesn't have the same warm and fuzzy feel. But maybe I'm oversensitive.”

“I'm a girl of extremes. When I love something, I'm like a puppy dog (without all the licking). When I'm cranky, I'm a wasp (like a whole hive of 'em). And when I'm angry, I'm a Mother Bear with a predator after her cubs: Dangerous.”

“I can talk to fish!" Angel said happily, water dripping off her long, skinny body. "Ask one over for dinner," Fang said, joining us.”

“You mean other than the wings? I once ate nine snicker bars in a row without barfing. It was a record.”

“Max, if you survive your final test, can you steal me one of those magic outfits for me?”

“How did you become blind, uh, Jeff is it?”

“If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion, and avoid the people, you might better stay home.”

“Call me sentimental, but there's no-one in the world that I'd like to see get dysentery more than you”

“The trouble was that he was talking in philosophy but they were listening in gibberish.”

“Your as slow as a fat kid on crutches”

“Stupid men are the only ones worth knowing after all.”

“Well, even if the serpent bites off your head,” says Tatterfell, “the rest of you will still look good.”