Humor Quote by William Goldman — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Inconceivable!”

“I am your Prince and you will marry me," Humperdinck said.”

“I mean, I really do think that love is the best thing in the world, except for cough drops. But I also have to say, for the umpty-umpth time, that life isn't fair. It's just fairer than death, that's all.”

“Enough about my beauty," Buttercup said. "Everybody always talks about how beautiful I am. I've got a mind, Westley. Talk about that.”

“The Prince found Buttercup waiting unhappily outside his chamber doors.”

“Buttercup's mother whirled on him. 'Did you forget to pay your taxes?' (This was after taxes. But everything is after taxes. Taxes were here even before stew.)”

“Begin at the beginning," the King said, very gravely, "and go on till you come to the end: then stop.”

“The mind is a complex and many-layered thing, Potter... or at least, most minds are...”

“Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar.”

“Jocks usually aren't smart. Their muscles feast on their brains.”

“Bad kitty!" he screeched, snarling and baring his fangs at Grimalkin, who yawned and turned away to groom his tail. "Evil, evil, sneaky kitty! Bite your head off in your sleep, I will! Hang you by your toes and set you on fire! Burn, Burn!”

“Want to have a short phone call with someone? Call them at 11:55 a.m., right before lunch. They'll talk fast. You may think you are interesting, but you are not more interesting than lunch.”