Humor Quote by Dorothy Parker — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“I like to have a martini,”

“That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.”

“Little Words”

“Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away.”

“If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised.”

“I require three things in a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.”

“I WILL NOT TOLERATE MENTION OF YOUR ABNORMALITY UNDER THIS ROOF!”

“A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.”

“why can't you see i'm a kid', said the kid.”

“No, I really did. I walked into that room and saw the hottest, sexiest guy I've ever seen - wet and half naked. And I said, "E”

“You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading... and all of a sudden you notice your eyes are closed? I'm like that all the time.”

“Everyone thinks you've been kidnapped," he said. "We've been scouring the ship. When Coach Hedge finds out- oh, gods, you've been here all night?”