Humor Quote by Patricia Briggs — Inspiring Words on Life, Love & Wisdom

“Why is it that all cars are women?" he asked.”

“Cheeses crusty, got all musty, got damp on the stone of a peach,” I agreed. He looked blank, so I repeated it with proper emphasis. “ ChEEZ-zes crusty. Got Al -musty. Got DAMp on the StoneofapeaCH.”

“Are you going to tell me what that was about?” Adam asked as we went back upstairs.”

“Some truths are truths, no matter who says them.”

“Women are sneaky.”

“One of my professors once told me that the last official act of the British monarchy was when Queen Victoria refused to sign a law that made same-sex acts illegal. It would have made me think more highly of her, except the reason she objected was because she didn’t believe women would do anything like that. Parliament rewrote the law so it was specific to men, and she signed it. A tribute to enlightenment, Queen Victoria was not. Neither, as I have observed before, are werewolf packs.”

“Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise... surprise and fear... fear and surprise... Our two weapons are fear and surprise... and ruthless efficiency.... Our three weapons are fear, and surprise, and ruthless efficiency... and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope... Our four... no... Amongst our weapons... Amongst our weaponry... are such elements as fear, surprise... I'll come in again.”

“I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.”

“They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," Valkyrie said.”

“FEAR stands for fuck everything and run.”

“She can go with us to the lab and keep Myrnin pinned down while we pull the plug, if he's not... you know, better.”

“Sun is bad for you. Everything our parents said was good is bad. Sun, milk, red meat...college,”